i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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