Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
organizing the empties. That sober.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
