last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
