So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
operation have a gay friend backfired
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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