I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
