your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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