margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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