Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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