May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
