shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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