What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
bring money and cleavage
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
