Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
