try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
