Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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