id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
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