You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
