dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
