would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
apparently the secret to your success is patron
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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