My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
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