I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize