theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I need to align my fucking chakras
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