Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize