I cockslap morals
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize