I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize