So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
My dad just said "fuck circus"
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
