I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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