Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
