I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
i out mim tonsoeep
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