I cockslap morals
i love accidental penises.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
