No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Randomize
