Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Randomize
