i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
this just has baby written all over it
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
