i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
