Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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