The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
