I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
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