Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize