i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize