He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Pants are for mortals
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize