Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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