No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
