I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
