Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
How does it feel to date your dad?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
