Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
