Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(916): View more from California

rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war

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(301): View more from Maryland

Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.

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(310): View more from California

totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.

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(254): View more from Texas

Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty

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(785): View more from Kansas

WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS

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(816): View more from Missouri

I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.

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(330): View more from Ohio

Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.

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(778): View more from British Columbia

Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.

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