im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
