i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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