love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
