I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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