So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
