that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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