I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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