i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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