The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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